The familiars of that peculiar Second Millennium sect, The Academy of Humanism, have been canoodling with their Green opposite numbers in the Papal Scientific Secretariat ever since Steve Gould and Carl Sagan's improbable pilgrimage to the Vatican Observatory in 1986 , seeking the confirmation of the nuclear winter hypothesis as canon law.
Latter day eco-evangelists are angling for the Mother Of All Ecumenical Endorsements for carbon offsets. Most PR overtures are rebuffed by the Holy See, but now California's Planktos corporation claims their effort to reduce the carbon footprint of the shoes of the fisherman is a Done Deal.
With their Cold Fusion stock offerings dead in the water, Planktos Corporation execs have spun off KlimaFa, transitioning from alternative energy to ecclesiastic polity with a press release announcing :
' The New Vatican Climate Forest Initiative to Fully Green the Holy See.'
San Francisco -- July 12, 2007 --
By agreement with the Vatican, Planktos/KlimaFa is now pleased and honored to announce that the Vatican plans to become the world's first entirely carbon neutral sovereign state, and it has accepted KlimaFa ecorestoration offsets to achieve this historic goal. In a brief ceremony on July 5th the Vatican declared that it had gratefully accepted KlimaFa's offer to create a new Vatican Climate Forest in Europe that will initially offset all of the Vatican City State's CO2 emissions for this year.
His Most Reverend Eminence Cardinal Paul Poupard presided at the event and stated, As President of the Pontifical Council of Culture; I am honored to receive this donation from the leaders of Planktos-KlimaFa. This donation means an entire section of a national park in central Europe will be reforested.
Planktos might better do the Lord's work by telling Rome about Los Angeles Cool Cities Initiative. If the City of the Angels can crop degrees off its microclimate by planting shade trees,and promoting pale paint and pavements to reduce solar heating, why shouldn't all the campaniles in Christendom sprout windmills overlooking un-leaded cathedral roofs Adventitiously attired in green turf?