Strange New Element From A Distant World Invades The Aperiodic Table
This has led Scientific American to encourage patriotic ubergeeks & geekettes to track down the missing comic book element Adamantium before renegade X-Men swap the silvery body-building aid for recreational alkaloids or unobtanium. I fear the 154 year old magazine may be too late. How can Sci Am be sure the wily metal wasn't discovered ages ago?
The annals of chemistry are awash with apocryphal elements that , instead of proving elemental , turned out to be compounds, alloys, or cases of mistaken identity. Many still enjoyed their moment of published fame before demotion to the dustbin of chemistry. More alas, than there are real elements. 120-odd former ones lurk in the index of Gmelin's Comprehensive Inorganic Chemistry alone.
Neptunium takes the cake. Un-discovered twice in the 1880's, its name was first applied to a ringer for germanium (nee' Ekasilicon), and when that didn't pan out , to some pseudo-niobium (AKA Columbium). Re-aborted as Eka-rhenium in 1939, the unfortunate stuff was finally banished from The Aperiodic Table after suffering honest-to-gosh discovery in 1941-- it is now a bona fide nuclear bomb material.
So raise a Bohemium glass of Demonium rum to rescuing periodic chart rejects from deserved obscurity by getting Tom Lehrer to compose an encore to The Elements [click to listen.] To encourage the effort , please get the lead out , and send paypal donations to Mnestheus@aol.com --it costs the equivalent of 100 pounds of iron (alias Nebulium) a month to run this place.
Absent Adamantium , Adamant , whose name pertains to mere carbon-the monoisotopic diamond described in US Patent 3,895,313, will offer Lehrer the coveted Nobelium Prize Medal if he performs prestissimo. He'll have to. The half-life of his trans-uranic gong will give him 58 minutes in which to figure out what rhymes with :
Accretium , Agusterde , Alabamium , Alcaligène , Alkalinium , Aldebaranium
Andronium, Anglium , Anglohelvetium , Angularium , Archonium , Aridium
Asterium , Athenium , Ausonium , Austrium Berzelium , Bohemium , Brevium
Carolinium , Cassiopeium , Celtium , Centium , Centurium , Cererium
Ceresium , Colonium , Coronium , Crodonium , Cyclonium ,Cyclotronium...
>This way to the Dor, Incognitum, and Phtor: All names unfortunately guaranteed real
Warning : Although certifiably non-toxic by virtue of their non-existence , these elements are subject to TSA regulation when liquid. Their use in coinage , pacifiers, or instruments of nuclear deterrence is not recommended.
Dakin , Danium , Danubium , Davyum , Decipium , Demonium , Denebium
Dianium , Didymium , Diplogenium , Donarium , Dor
Emanium , Eosium , Erythronium , Esperium , Euprosium , Eurosamarium
Euxenium , Extremium
Geocoronium , Gourium
Helvetium , Hesperium , Hibernium
Illinium , Ilmenium , Incognitium , Infracarbon , Ionium
Jargonium , Joliotium , Junonium
Klaprothium , Kosmium
Leptin , Lewisium , Littorium , Lucium
Magnium , Masrium , Masurium , Meitnium , Melinium , Menachin
Mesothorium ,Metargon , Moldavium , Mosandrum , Muriaticum , Muride
Nebulium , Neokosmium , Neothulium , Neoytterbium , Newium , Newtonium
Nigrium , Nipponium , Niton , Nonactinium , Norium , Norwegium , Novum
Ochroite , Odinium , Offium , Orthohelium , Ostranium
Panchromium , Panormium , Pelopium , Percentium , Philippium , Phtor
Pluranium , Polinium , Praedicium , Prodaniukium , Ptene
Radlabium , Rolandium , Russium
Scheelium , Scotium , Sequanium , Sirium , Spectrium
Thelike , Therine , Thoron , Tyrium
Ultimium , Universitium
Vesbium , Vestaeium , Vestium , Virginium
Wasium , Welsium , and Wodanium
Like nobelium ,Kryptonite may not be long for this world either. Geoestablishmentarians are insisting that ,as it does not contain krypton, it must be formally named Jadarite ,after its Serbian place of discovery, to be immortalized in the European Journal of Mineralogy later this year.